Tuesday, 31 May 2016

BDSM research

At the MM Romance Meeting in Verona this weekend, I talked about writing BDSM.
One of the things I stressed was the importance of research, be that books, articles, blogs, visits or talking to people for whom BDSM is part of their life and therefore know a whole lot more than I do.
Someone once said to me that if an author hadn't experienced BDSM for themselves, they shouldn't write about it.
I disagree.
Everything I write gets seen by someone who does know what they're talking about. They give advice, technical hints, you name it... That last comment made me nervous when a VERY experienced Dom told me he was going to read An Unlocked Heart, the first book in the Collars & Cuffs series.
So imagine how I felt when his first comment to me when he'd finished it was, "Wow. You write BDSM how I live it."
I think he would have laughed if he'd seen the major fist pump I did.

At the meeting this weekend, someone in the audience asked me to list the books I consult on a regular basis, so here they are.
My first port of call is always Jay Wiseman if I'm writing a scene and I want to get the technical stuff right.
The Leatherman's Handbook has been re-released a few times, and is definitely worth a read.
Where Jay Wiseman is mostly about the technicalities, Charley Ferrer is more about the emotions.
Urban Aboriginals and Leathersex - well, the subtitles speak for themselves...